Dear Society

Dear Society,

Sometimes I sit back behind my keypad or keyboard crying, not because someone beat me or hurt me, not because I sliced onion, not because I am close to the kitchen, BUT because every step of the way I see a people who have putso much IMPORTANCE on the VAGINA thereby leaving the BRAIN useless and less functional…

I see a society where after you finish your university and emerge with a beautiful degree, you head to get a job that you qualify for, but the man seated before you asks you to forget the certificate and use what your have – your vagina, to secure your spot in the office, I still don’t get it.

I see a society that will rather invest in beauty pageantry for females than on the intelllectual development of the girl child.

I asked someone why the society places so much importance on the vagina but downplays the brain and his simple answer was because “the society likes sex” that is why for advertising even coffee, they attach a sex appeal. Sad but true.

I see a bride used as the picture for a hotel billboard and still I don’t understand why.

No wonder a lecturer in school would rather ask to sleep with a lady to let her pass a course she sat for and wrote well.

Sex sells. Every day. No wonder people would rather chuckle and giggle whenever a topic on sex is brought but frown and sigh when a topic on the importance of reading and the development of the mind is raised.

NOW bringing this crazy importance we attach on sex and the vagina; this is one of the highest reasons why victims of sexual exploitation, abuse or rape would rather choose to be silent about it than speak up because they feel they have been DAMAGED.

I’ve been having talks with some people and many of them said, their lives never remained the same after the incident and the sad part of this tale is that they are intelligent fellows who by society’s standard have been damaged.

If a lady was a virgin before an abuse case, the society makes it as though her life has ended. I have had an almost similar scenerio with some Nigerians who wanted to make me feel as though my life had ebded, but not until I reminded them they were late to the party, and they kept staring at me in shock and disbelief wondering if this one had shame at all.
Of course I had no shame as regards matters like this because I have come to know that many of them are hypocrital hypocritics( don’t ask me the meaning).

I know the pride in saving one’s virginity till after the wedding but spare me the sentimental bullcrap when you subtly initiate that someone should hang a noose around their neck just because they lost their virginity. Life does not end there.
If a person has theirs intact, fine for them and them alone, but if a person does not have theirs, they should not be castigated, cos you never know.

We channel so much energy to irrelevant matters while we should be focused on more important matters. Like saving the world from HATE, ENVY, And chronic IGNORANCE.

And i’ve come to know that many of them did not live the way they are preaching and advocating for you to live.

Then over to the group that have mastered their game in slut-shaming ladies, I pity their sorry asses because I have come to understand that ignorance does more harm than even the corruption we sing and clap about.
If you slut-shame a lady and she buys it, owns it and turns around to use it to her advantage, sorry for you.

Dear Ladies, your value, worth, esteem, importance and social graces does NOT lie in your Vagina, but in your brain and in how you are able to channel your knowledge and intellect into World advantage.

#DemystifyAbuse

Dear Tiger


Dear Tiger

How are you? It’s been a while I wrote you, that’s because life happened and has been happening.
How’s your living and life in general coming? I’m sure it’s super awesome because I feel it in my spirit and feel it in the physical too.

It’s expedient for me to write you at this stage of my life, simply because this is a defining stage in my life and in our union.
I’m sure by now you should have heard of some tales as regards my sexuality and of course about the rape.
But Tiger Mi, I keep hearing tales too, saying a lot of stuff I wouldn’t want to take to mind.
Mine, they said a woman who is a victim of rape can never find love, I know they lie from the pit of their insecurity because I trust that you are not just any man, but that one who will fit perfectly and excellently into the gaps between my fingers. Thus, you’d love me as no man has ever loved his woman, because me, because you, because us, because power couple, because couple fit for purpose.

Ade Mi, they said a victim of rape can never have emotional attractions to a man and that if ever it happens she would do so with both eyes opened for fear of being taken for granted. Ade,I love you and I feel it too, because I feel not based on emotions alone but rooted in the ever faithful, ever enduring, ever glorious love of God which surpasseth understanding.
I know no insecurity, I know you don’t and won’t take me for granted, neither will U ever take you for you for granted. (you know I won’t, because you know me and deeply; deeper than the surface, but deeo into my core.
This love I have and will always have for and towards you will be based on unconditional choice and decision; one I’d make and remake every day as the rays of the light hit the panes of my windows or as it rays sip through my curtains.

Mine, I’d still love you as wholly as you deserve and as Christ thought me to.
Sunshine, each day as the sun shines and as the rain pour, I’ve made up my mind to use my hurt to heal all I can, I’ve made up my mind to share my strength to those whose strength needs a boost. And I know I have your support in totality, your emotional support, your psychological support, your physical support, your spiritual support and your financial support.
(gosh, I’m blessed. Your kind is rare. Your kind usually comes into existence every ten thousand years. Yes, you are rare like that. I love you.)

I live not in hurt, as forgiveness is a virtue bestowed on us by God himself through His Son. And this knowledge is the core foundation of selflessness.
I believe you love me, and you support me every step of the way.
I am thanking God each day for the gift of you.
I bless the day our paths crossed as we held our hands walking towards our future with out customised sneakers and shirt.

Yours Always
Tigress.